Friday, 19 February 2010

The wages of sin

Id: I had a couple of pints this evening.

Super-ego: Ah, there, you see, that's where you went wrong!

Id: As I was saying, I had a couple of pints this evening.

Super-ego: When will you learn?! A glass of wine, a couple of shorts, but, no, you will insist - occasionally - on drinking whole pints - pints, I ask you! Not one pint, but pints, in the plural!

Id: Of course, on the way home I was desperate for the loo. I got off the tube at Golders Green because I couldn't contain myself any longer.

Super-ego: You were looking for a hedge, I suppose!

Id: I asked the staff at the ticket barrier whether the public loos at Golders Green are still open.

Super-ego: That's hardly realistic, is it?! Since when were public toilets at major transport hubs open... at night!?

Id: The guys shook their heads forlornly and directed me to the KFC around the corner. I got there just as they were closing.

Super-ego: What do you want to be bothering those people for? Haven't they got enough to worry about, earning such low pay, etc, without having to put up with dissolute middle-class egoists like you, bothering them in the middle of the night?

Id: I begged them to let me use their loo, even though they had just cleaned it.

Super-ego: Selfish! Purely selfish!

Id: I must have looked really desperate, perhaps they had been in the same situation themselves once or twice...

Super-ego: How likely?!

Id: I thanked them profusely and scuttled back to the tube station. I slunk home feeling rather chastened.

Super-ego: I should think so!

Id: But I'd do it all again, so I would!

Ego: Why are there so few public toilets open in London? The picture is not that much better in the daytime, when people haven't - sinfully or entirely reasonably - you decide - gone for a drink. This is a rich country. Can't we afford public toilets anymore? Or is it only me that hates travelling around this great city of ours with her knees pressed together?

P.S. Rog T had similar trouble the other night while using Thameslink.

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